Taking a Second Stab at Marriage

In August 1995 we moved back to Pennsylvania--myself, Tom, Seth and Brogan. We initially lived in a rental house right next to Washington Hospital. It was small but cozy. My house in Virginia didn't sell until March 1996 so money was tight, but my school loans got paid off so that helped!

Once my home in Virginia sold, we started looking for a house to buy. We decided to build a home in a lovely neighborhood on a dead end street in a GREAT school district. Once we made that decision, we also decided to get married--I was going to take the plunge again!

We chose our wedding date based on when we could get a condo in Aruba--our chosen honeymoon destination. We got married at the Washington County Courthouse (it has a beautiful rotunda) with the boys and my two half-sisters in attendance. Later we lunched at a local Mexican food restaurant (Hungry Jose's if I remember correctly). That was a Wednesday I think. The next day we drove the boys to Winchester and met their dad since he was going to have them for the month of July. That weekend we headed to Aruba!

I fell in LOVE with Aruba and promised myself I would go back every 5 years or so. Unfortunately I haven't been back since but I do hope to sometime! We had a great 2 bedroom condo with a full kitchen and made friends with a great bartender named Andre! We met a couple of brothers we hung out with, as well as a mom and her daughter. Tom played guitar on the beach and we even went to areas tourists don't go! It was a great week, even though we BOTH got sunburned (I think the ONLY time he has ever been sunburned). It was definitely a good decision to spend our money on a honeymoon instead of a wedding!

Two months after we got married I got pregnant with Kendyl (I could see some of my relatives counting to make sure we were not pregnant when we got married). During that pregnancy we moved into our new home--it was the weekend between Christmas and New Years! But those are posts for another day!

Moving Back Home

After my divorce from my first husband, I dated a few guys but eventually met the love of my life. Tom and I started dating in January of 1994 (our first date was to watch football on Championship Monday). We hit it off and by February of 1995 he suggested we move back to Pennsylvania. My mom was diagnosed with cancer at the end of 1994 and I had been spending a lot of time driving back and forth to see her. On our Valentine's Day date, he suggested moving back. I had not really considered it, and the idea excited me.

It took a while to find a job--I interviewed in Indiana, PA, Mt. Pleasant/Norwin, Uniontown and Burgettstown. I decided I didn't want to live TOO close to home, so I nixed the Mt. Pleasant job. Tom wanted to go back to college to finish his degree so we wanted to be near Pitt. Thus, I took the Burgettstown job. This also allowed me to have the remainder of my school loans paid off! That was a huge benefit!

The odd part about moving back to Pennsylvania is that I actually did not get to spend enough time with my mom, even though that is the reason I moved back! When I lived in Va I would come up here for days at a time, often a week. Living closer to her, I saw her more frequently, but only for a few hours at a time. That was a weird irony with our move. Add two more kids into the mix and we didn't travel to see her nearly as much as I wish we had!

Moving back to Pennsylvania changed my life as well as the lives of Tom, Seth and Brogan. I will never know how life would have progressed if I had stayed in Richmond, but I'm happy with how things have turned out here. There are good things and bad things, but I'm overall happy with my life now. This was another one of my major pivotal events!

Becoming a Parent--Life's Most Momentous Decision

The years of medical school flew by. I got married between my third and fourth years (I only had a week off and was late for my own rehearsal due to my surgery orals). I went on to do a residency in Richmond since my husband was a year behind me. He joined me at Chesterfield Family Practice the following year.

We knew we wanted to start a family while in residency. All of my friends already had a kid or two (or three) and I was afraid to wait too long. Fortunately the trail had been blazed for me in my residency program--one previous resident had a baby during residency my first year. So I planned my schedule such that I got most of my difficult/busy rotations done early in my third year so that I could relax a little later in the year.

I remember finding out I was pregnant. We had been "trying" for a few months (as much as we could considering he was an intern and spending every third night and third weekend at the hospital), and I was moonlighting in the ER at Johnston-Willis Hospital. I mentioned to my coworkers that I was planning to go to Kings Dominion that weekend (an amusement part with lots of roller coasters) and they insisted I take a pregnancy test since I was a day or two late (not unusual at that stage of my life). I didn't have any symptoms of being pregnant (I never have, with any of my pregnancies), but I did it to humor them. Low and behold, it was positive! That was June of 1988. Seth joined our family on February 8, 1989 and my life was forever changed.

Someone once said that having a child is like letting your heart walk around outside of your body. That is so very true! I was forever changed when I held my child for the very first time! And I can tell you, it never gets old. I was in just as much awe when CJ (my youngest) was born. And the two in between (Brogan and Kendyl)! With everything I have accomplished in my life, my children are by far the most important and the most cherished of all!

I have not been a perfect mother, I don't think anyone is perfect. But I have done my best. I have made mistakes, but I think my four children are pretty great people with good heads on their shoulders. That makes me happier than anything else I have ever accomplished!

Back to Those Pivotal Events

When I started this blog, I wanted to share the many "pivotal events" that have shaped my life. I discussed my father's death by suicide, moving to a different state at age 11, and finding out my first husband was gay. These are but a few of the events that have shaped my life. I want to return to this goal and share more of my life with everyone.

Getting into medical school was without a doubt one of the most momentous events in my life. Throughout high school and college I was a very good student, so I assumed it would be easy to get into med school. I was very wrong. Since I thought it would be easy, I only applied to 5 schools. Of those, I only got interviews with 3--Johns Hopkins, Penn State at Hershey, and MCV. I didn't get invited to interview at UVa or Pitt.

My first interview was at Johns Hopkins. In retrospect, I should have scheduled that one later. It was VERY high pressured. They questioned my choice of college, stating that with my grades I could have gone to an ivy league school. I tried to explain that expense was a factor, as was my desire to participate in competitive horseback riding. I did NOT enjoy that interview at all. Despite Johns Hopkins being a world-renowned hospital, it is in a very bad section of Baltimore that made me nervous. I was not accepted there, but was put on a waiting list.

My second interview was at Penn State's medical school at Hershey. I remember it was on a Monday--the night before I stayed at a hotel and I watched the Super Bowl on TV. San Francisco won, though I don't remember who they were playing. Strange the things one remembers. The actual interview, I don't remember much of for some reason. It was not nearly as stressful, but it must not have stood out in any way, I suppose. I was also put on a waiting list for this school.

My final interview was at MCV. It was a very snowy day and I had to drive over Afton Mountain to get there. After a harrowing two plus hour drive, I got to MCV. One of the people who was to interview me didn't make it in that day due to the weather (and I drove all the way from Bridgewater), but the ones who did interview me were wonderful! They even had a student interview me which was AWESOME since she was able to answer many of my questions that I didn't feel right asking professors. It was a great experience and I especially loved the different way of teaching--by organ system rather than individual subjects (anatomy, biochemistry, etc.).

Then came the waiting.....and waiting.....and waiting. By the end of February I had not heard anything. I was leaving for a 3-week trip to Europe for my interterm and I had not heard anything. I left instructions with my boyfriend at the time to check my mail daily and I would call when I could to find out. This was before the days of email and cellphones. After visits to Iceland, Luxembourg, France and Switzerland, I finally had the opportunity to call him from Cologne, Germany. I had been accepted to MCV!!! The rest of my European trip was so much less stressful after finding this out!

So that is how I ended up attending MCV for medical school. I feel it was the best choice for me, even if the choice was not entirely left up to me. I had a wonderful experience at MCV, both academically and socially. It was the right fit and one that helped forge my future!

Portion Control is Working!

I am 5 days into the 21 Day Fix. For those of you who are not aware, it is a diet and exercise program that stresses portion control. I usually eat very healthy foods, but I eat LARGE amounts of these healthy foods. I have also given up alcohol. The diet allows 3 glasses of wine per week (on 3 different days), but I know myself and I could never stop at one glass of wine! So I have chosen to give it up completely unless I have one if I go out to dinner.

In 4 days I have lost 1.4 pounds. Not bad. At that rate I should lose 7 lbs in the 21 days. I was hoping for more like 10, but we shall see. The workouts are challenging but not overly difficult. I have had to do the variations about half the time and I hope to decrease this over the 3 weeks. The first few days I was so very sore!! Getting up and down hurt, as did going down stairs. I am much less sore now!

My long range goal is to lose 40-50 pounds by May (my step-daughter's wedding). I plan to take one week "off" between each cycle. I don't plan to go crazy during that time, but I will enjoy a bit of alcohol and a bit more cheese. I will need 6-7 cycles to reach my goal. This is consistent with May as my goal date! So far I have not been tempted to cheat and I have done the workout every day, even work days!!

I'm very happy with how things are going on this plan. I usually don't even get all of my allotted food in each day! The only category I wish I could have more of is the blue container--cheese, avocado, and nuts. But I'm learning to live with only one serving a day of these. Tomorrow will be challenging since I'm going to a Samhain celebration and there will be food--I can't really whip my little containers out to measure, so I'm going to have to eyeball it.

Today was fun also because we picked out Kendyl's senior pictures. They turned out beautifully! They were also incredible expensive. Over a thousand dollars! Yikes! AND her car needs work. Double Yikes! Broke days ahead for me!

Well, I'm out for now. Have a great weekend everyone!!!

Fun in NYC!

For the past few days I have been visiting my eldest son, Seth Evans, in NYC. It has been a blast!! I got here on Tuesday and, after giving the taxi driver his OLD address, had to walk about 15 minutes to get to his NEW place (dementia setting in). On Wednesday we got to attend the taping of one of my FAVORITE shows--The Chew! I was hoping to meet some of the hosts, but we didn't get to, sadly. Still it was a blast!! Here is a view of the set!

On Thursday we went to the Avengers Experience in near Times Square and then on to Madame Toussaud's! I even won the "selfie" contest for the week--I'm still waiting to hear what I won, but here is the picture I won with:

Friday the mood was more somber as we went to the 9/11 Memorial. That day deeply affected me and watching all the footage and seeing all the wreckage and pictures just brought all of that back! I think they did a tremendous job in a very respectful way. I thought back to my very first trip to NYC in 1993 and getting to go to the top of the WTC. I want to go home and find the pictures I took that day! Here is a view of one of the fountains at the footprint of one of the towers and a picture of the Freedom Tower.

Today we checked out the HighLine--this is a beautiful path along an old train track that spans from about 12th Street all the way up to 34th Street. We walked it from 14th Street til the end. Gorgeous views of buildings and the Port of New York. We even saw an NCL cruise ship in port. It was very hot and I almost didn't make it. Now I am sitting in the a/c cooling off. Tonight I am taking Seth and his roommates to Becco, the nice restaurant where Seth and Jamal both work. It will be a fitting end to a great trip!

Here is a view from the HighLine:

I have to go back to Pittsburgh tomorrow but not until evening. Seth is going to try to get off work so we can go watch the game together at his favorite Steeler Bar. THAT will be a great way to end my trip especially if we win!!

Starting Anew at 49

Image via WikipediaSeptember 17, 2010 was the start of my new life. For the past 15 years, I have been working in Family Practice at the same Clinic, with the same people, and taking care of the same patients. It had become quite comfortable. Last year, my hours were cut due to the economy, though eventually one of our doctors left and I went back to full time hours. However, during the time I was on a reduced schedule, I put some feelers out for a new, or an additional, position.


Since January, I was back to being comfortable. Out of the blue I got a phone call offering me a position with an Urgent Care company. They offered me more money (substantially) for working less days (though still averaging the same total hours). I had several friends with the company who all said they loved what they were doing and encouraged me to make the change.

With some trepidation I submitted my resignation in May, giving my company ample time to find a replacement. The next four months were filled with bittersweet moments, especially my final week. I am so going to  miss many of the friends I have made over the years, but I know we will do our best to keep in touch. I needed to do something to reduce my stress (financial stress as well as the stress that comes with Primary Care, like losing patients and dealing with habitual drug seekers).

I began my new job yesterday with excitement and a bit of nervousness. It couldn't have gone better. The other doctor and the PA I worked with eased me into the routine, taught me how to use the EMR, and were delightful people to chat with and get to know. I can tell I will fit in here without reservation. Time to make new friends! The patients appreciated being taken care of promptly and were not demanding of all the extras the typical patient asks of their PCP. I am looking forward to this new chapter in my life!


My next step is moving. Next month, my son and I will be moving into a new apartment. I am sure that will be another adventure! I am taking the opportunity to pare down our belongings and am going to go for a more Zen approach to our lives. I'm even studying Feng Shui!